Monday, February 6, 2012

Paper concerns

I think I may need to split my paragraphs up a bit more, they're just a little long. The transitions could also use work. I really don't know what could be fixed or changed, since I'm not really that familiar with how rhetorical analysis are properly written. I think my arguments are mostly solid, though they could probably use refining.

1 comment:

  1. Spencer,
    -The paragraphs could be split up. The second and third paragraphs each take up almost a full page.
    -The introduction is strong, maybe mention the two ads in the intro as well.
    -For the first ad you may need to talk about the target audience and the values of that targeted audience.
    -The paragraph about the second add is much better and clear.
    -Conslusion is good. It could mention the ads once more.
    -I think the transitions will improve when the paragraphs are split up.
    -You do have solid arguments but like you said they could use some refining.
    -It kept my interest which is really good.
    -Overall, it was a really good paper

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